I’ve been blessed with a lot. A roof over my head, a little money in the bank, a good chance for a fairly good job (that has great experience), a loving wife, and good friends. I have a computer on my lap and I’m sitting in a big, comfy chair. Everything should be right in my world.
Yet this morning, I allowed a little thing to steal my joy. For a few minutes, I forgot about all of my blessings. I forgot how much God loved me and how valuable I was. I lost my joy.
I’ve got it back now, but I think God allowed it to happen to teach me a couple lessons: that things I put my value in other than Him will be able to steal my joy from me and that I too often take for granted all that He’s given me.
Sometimes, I don’t even take it for granted, but I forget the Giver, which is worse. Every morning I wake up next to Leah, I’m amazed that she’s there, that I have someone willing to share her life with me on such a close, personal level. Though I’m stunned by the gift, I don’t thank God for her often enough.
It is not enough that we remember God’s blessings. We must also remember Who gave them to us. God is there for me more constantly than Leah could possibly be. He loves me more than she does or ever will. He wants to give me good things more than she does.
And then comes the hard part: we must let ourselves be loved.
We humans are funny creatures. We seek so desperately to be loved and accepted, yet when real love is shown to us, or even the closest thing that another fallen human has to offer, we question why we’re getting it. Rather than accept it, we try to earn it or even push it away if we can’t get used to the idea that we’re loved.
To be perfectly honest, I don’t know how to get used to the idea that Leah loves me as much as she does. I have no problem at all loving her, but accepting her love is a constant struggle. It would be even more overwhelming trying to accept God’s love if I could even fathom how strong it was.
In most of my posts, I try to make a point. In this one, I’m asking for your input, particularly from those of you who have learned to let yourself be loved. I’m thinking that it starts with letting God love me a little, then using Leah’s love to help me understand and accept just how huge and strong His love for me is, then start accepting the full measure of His love. But that’s just a guess, and it seems like a huge step between part 1 and part 2 of that plan and from part 2 to part 3 might well be even bigger. Does anyone have any ideas of where to start or what I should do? Thanks, and God bless.