One of my best friends is getting married in October in Virginia. Leah and I were debating about whether to go, then decided that if we could stay with friends on our road trip, we’d do it. People offered us places to stay as soon as they knew we were coming and we’re now set for lodging.
I’m excited, not just for the wedding, but for seeing all my old friends. Some of them I’ve known for seven years and we’ve been through a lot together. By that, I mostly mean they put up with me when I was at my worst. But we’ve shared hundreds if not thousands of laughs together, had dozens of inside jokes, played many games, watched many movies, and had a lot of deep, personal conversations. In other words, these people are not just my friends; some are more like my extended family. Though our apartment is now home on a level I haven’t felt since at least college (I stayed in the same room all four years and through the three summers in between), Colorado is not my home state as much as Virginia.
They say that “home is where the heart is.” Part of my home will always be in Virginia then. Not enough of my home is in God’s word. I wonder sometimes why I can’t draw as close to God as I can to my wife or to other friends. Part of it is that my chief love language (if you don’t know yours, I highly recommend finding out at http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/) is touch, but then my second one is quality time. God is always willing to listen to me. Third is acts of service; His constant watching over my life certainly is the most service anyone has ever done for me. Fourth is gifts; and Jesus is a better gift than Leah could ever give me. Fifth is words of affirmation; the Bible tells me I’m a son and heir of God. So really, whatever your love languages are, God has all but touch covered abundantly.
Which brings me back to my question of why I am not as close to Him as I should be, why I can’t give my heart fully to Him. It’s not that I don’t love Him and have a healthy fear of Him; I just don’t have the passion I believe I should. This post doesn’t have the answer; if anything, I’m asking you for your thoughts or, more particularly, how you stay close to God. Thanks!